Virgo is a labyrinth, a paradox of feelings. She is romantic and conjures magic with her walk; her body telegraphs a knowledge her mind may not catch. She may be a creature of ambivalence, a heated body with a cool mind. She makes the art of love into a craft, fashioning relationships slowly, with delicate fingers, body, and smiles backed by an incessantly active and practical brain.
Whatever Lola wants, Lola is apt to get, but she also gives Larry his due. She is typically a dedicated, serious lover. Hers is not to reason why; the how interests her more. How does it fit into the framework of her life? How will this relationship work? How does he like her best? How would he be as a husband, father, friend? These are questions she always asks herself.
The Virgo Woman has a haunting, eternally youthful quality unless she mars it with skittishness or nagging. She is often love's servant and happily complies with her own desire to cater to her husband and to his whims. She arrives at dates ahead of time, buys his favorite records to play in her bedroom, scrubs the bathroom and sprays it full of his favorite perfume.
She is most eager to please and to learn. She is genuinely curious about him. She wants to know everything, from his favorite baby foods to his boyhood baseball idol. She wants to know his current preferences precisely so she can cook only what he likes. She queries him about his taste in women, films, television, and brands of beer, wine, alcohol, and cigars. She will probably want to know his preferred sleeping position and schedule. Most likely, she'll commit every scrap of information to memory forever. Only her desire for romance exceeds her curiosity.
She is bound to pamper or mother her man. She may prefer a man who needs to be educated, reeducated, or healed in some way. She may correspond with prisoners and fall in love with a parolee; she may meet her fiancé in a hospital ward or play Florence Nightingale to her own doctor.
She is flexible to a fault. Many a Virgo would accompany her man anywhere—to a California hot-tub party, a disco, a hip-hop club, a nude beach. But she will draw the line at sharing her man with anyone else unless it is her last chance and her only way of holding him. She can overcome a lot of jealousy and inhibitions in order to do what she deems necessary to make the relationship work.
She is generally astute, devoted, curious, and caring enough to make relationships last. It is her goal to do so once she has found her man. She is usually monogamous and makes it unnecessary for her mate to stray. She also has a natural protective instinct and may cover her lover with a careful shield against illness, poverty, or other ladies.
The Virgo Woman is almost universally a die-hard perfectionist. Nothing short of the best is good enough for the man she loves, and she aims to make sure he gets it. In addition, she is a perfectionist in her own needs for fulfillment. She wants what she wants from him, and if it is not forthcoming, she is likely to criticize him into helpless alienation. She may find herself deeply in love years after her marriage, but her man may build defenses against intimacy as well as against criticism, so that without their conscious knowledge an emotional distance is created.
Patterns in the Virgo Woman's Sexual Relationships
The Virgo Woman's sexual relationships tend to display the following patterns; to some extent, they apply to her platonic ties as well.
1. She has a highly internalized, often repressed sex drive for which she compensates by daydreaming. She is usually a late bloomer.
2. She tends to hold back from "getting emotional" and from making commitments. She may dislike experimentation on a wide scale, considering it beneath her, but a few Virgos go to the other extreme, as if in an attempt to outwit the archetype.
3. When she falls, she falls very hard, tumbling into a whole new dimension much as did Alice in Wonderland. She tends to have one man at a time, is intensely romantic, and may think that each new relationship is "it." She may have a great need to justify sexual activity to herself, and being in love may be the only way to do so.
4. She often attracts losers, hangers-on, the stray, or the sick. She likes to play nurse; it brings out her need to take care of people.
5. She usually marries early in a fit of passion that may surprise her. She frequently marries her childhood sweetheart and tends to believe it is forever— and it may be! Sometimes, though, it may take will power, coupled with guilt about divorce, to survive the roughest bumps.
6. Her relationships tend to have quality and depth, but they often lack spark. This may engender hostilities in later years. She is ill-equipped to cope with these and may ignore or internalize them, which is unhealthy.
7. If she divorces, she is apt to be unusually bitter and disappointed. Some Virgos stay single for the rest of their lives and rather enjoy it. Others may engage in simultaneous love affairs for the first time.
8. The best type of Virgo reladonship is one where both parties work at jobs they love and come together by mutual agreement. She may want to have a precise contract stipulating how, when, and for what purpose they join.
The Virgo Woman needs a man who is perfect. Short of that, he should be charming, sensitive, exceedingly industrious, honest, and capable. She enjoys a man who is a mirror image of herself, except that he must have more flair, humor, and spontaneity. These are qualities she admires and often lacks.
While she may adore inadequate males who need her desperately, she is best off with a male who is highly competent and secure both in his vocation and in his sexual prowess. She will not respect him if he is not a hardworking person, and she needs a sexually ardent and sensitive man to bring her out.
Virgo needs a man who is tolerant and easygoing. She probably doesn't have a lazy bone in her body, and she may be a dynamo who only stops to recharge her batteries once in a blue moon. She needs a man to slow her down, help her to run without excessive nervous energy. Her man should be a relaxed sort, a lazy pussycat on weekends, a take-it-easy fellow who means it. He should be a vital man with open attitudes, less critical than his mate, judging not on appearances but enjoying the diversity of human nature.
Virgo prefers a man who is stable and scrupulously honest. She does not want a schemer, swindler, con man, or adventurer. Playboys rarely appeal to her. She is more comfortable with a man she trusts, a man of the down-home variety.
She needs a man who is willing to work extra hard to understand her. Since he may have to help her open up, he should be sensitive to and unusually aware of feelings, and unashamed of his own. She needs a man who can help her transform her nervous intensity into stable self-love that can irrigate her passions.
She needs a man who understands freedom and can give it to her. She wants space to be free and self-sufficient, but she has such a strong need to be needed that she can be manipulated by others. The man who is best for her will never take advantage of this trait and will help her to balance her need to give with her need to run free.
He must be clean, well groomed, and neady dressed. He need not look dashing or expensively attired, but she appreciates quality in the smallest details. She has the eyes of an eagle and will probably notice every cigarette ash, stain, or wrinkle. The man who does not wash regularly or forgets to shave before making love, whose apartment is normally a shambles, can forget about her. She is extremely sensitive to odors, and something as intangible as his smell can make all the difference.
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