Aries Anger

A major block to healthy sexual expression is anger, which is connected to low self-esteem and the feeling of being ineffectual. The struggle for self-esteem and a sense of importance as a person is a basic human concern. Sexuality in an angry relationship is not a source of pleasure, nor is it a basis on which a couple can share growth and build mutual respect. Repressed or improperly expressed anger is destructive to self-esteem and to relationships. Anger properly communicated and directed can be a powerful motivating force, an agent of change, and a personal resource.

For the Aries Woman, anger is a time-tested coping mechanism that comes more easily than tears. She uses anger to attack when she feels defensive, to cover inner doubts and fears, and to manipulate her way to personal power. What she loses is intimacy.

Repressed sexuality produces anger. Repressed anger produces inadequate sexual functioning. A woman who smiles when she feels like screaming, agrees when she really wants to disagree, or gets a headache whenever the subject of sex is brought up by her partner—may wind up anorgasmic. She often seeks many sex partners in a vain search for satisfaction. She psychologically castrates her male partners by never climaxing and sabotages herself by repeatedly putting herself in situations where she can't possibly get what she needs. Love is based not on self-denial but on the affirmation of self. One who is angry cannot be affirmative. Angry women hold back sexually. Improper or poor sexual stimulation is only a secondary cause for sensory, orgasmic impoverishment.

Obviously, ridding oneself of anger is the answer. However, wild fights that grow in volume and frequency are destructive and are not recommended. Controlled-release fights, the method described by Dr. George Bach in The Intimate Enemy, are constructive. In these, partners begin with honest, levelheaded statements of their anger and needs and conclude by negotiating for space, change, or compromise. Blowing off steam by beating a mattress or some other inanimate object is also recommended unless done with the intent to punish or blame the partner.

The Aries Woman usually knows when she's angry, and this puts her in a minority. Most people have trouble identifying anger, which is often called depression, masochism, or frustration instead. It is essential that people recognize and admit when they are angry and learn ways to share their anger constructively.

The Aries Woman in her twenties thinks nothing of expressing anger explosively and manipulatively. She won't hesitate to leave the table in the midst of an argument, walk out, and slam the door—especially if she realizes she is losing the fight. In short, she gets in a rage and runs, attempting to show the party who dared to arouse her who the real boss is. What is missing is the realization that she chose to get angry and the commitment to work through the anger with the other person. At this stage, she is using anger as a power ploy. She is likely to leave many sexual partners dissatisfied until she stops running.

In her thirties, the Aries Woman simmers down a bit. She begins to disclose her inner workings to her partner. She learns to discuss what makes her angry, to reveal how this relates to childhood experiences, to acknowledge the fears and insecurities her anger covers. She now throws dishes and fights it out right away. She uses her anger as facilitator and intimacy maker, bulldozing psychic walls instead of raising them. At this point she needs a man who will listen, whose ego can take the periodic explosions, the exploratory conversations, and the heated sex.

In her forties, the Aries Woman definitely mellows out. In mid-life, she learns to balance, to get in touch with the opposite Libra qualities: harmonizing the "I" and the "We," cooperating, sharing. She has now accepted anger as a fact of life and has begun to figure out how best to use it as a catalyst. In mid-life the Aries Woman is more afraid of loneliness than women with other signs. She begins to hunger for a solid union. She has created a pattern of destructive and unforgettable exchanges, of stern independence, and she now sees the need to change in order to grow into the Libra nature which makes her complete. She no longer cherishes being in a position to slam the door on problems and arguments . . . particularly if she has no one to leave behind that door.

In her fifties, the Aries Woman has, to a degree, tamed her anger and made it a tool for growth. She has finally learned to manage confrontations diplomatically without feeling an affront to her natural pride. She has learned that her ego is not enhanced by anger and that significant relationships will not advance to the sound of screeching cars and aggressive, nonproductive warfare.

The Aries Woman feels her anger is justifiable. She feels superior to the person who makes her angry, and in the heat of the moment it is she who expects an apology. Basically, this reaction stems from her pride. She has difficulty taking any step she believes will leave her in an inferior position.

In order to demilitarize her anger, she must recognize those situations where she needs to get angry: to gain energy to change an old situation, to shore up the courage to be honest, to be heard by someone who normally ignores what she has to say. Choosing to be angry is a pragmatic policy that builds self-respect through the awareness that a choice has been made. The Aries Woman must recognize that as long as she uses anger as a weapon she cannot expect to have a lasting and sexually potent intimate relationship. She herself must exemplify caring behavior, which never includes destructively used anger.

A man would have to be brought up very atypically and be exceptionally sensitive and bright to understand the complexities of the Aries Woman's anger. The burden is on the woman to recognize that in order to build intimacy she must do away with unproductive explosions.

I advocate a five-step system to settle differences with a partner while using anger productively.

1. Decide on a no-fault relationship. No one needs to be blamed or made to feel guilty.

2. Agree to acknowledge the anger you feel for your partner. Decide not to let anger last for more than a day. Decide not to discuss a major issue when either of you is hurried or under stress.

3. Accept unconditionally your right, as well as your partner's, to be angry.

4. Renounce the right to vent anger hurtfully just to get your way. Learn to say, "I am angry with you, but you know that I will not attack you." Hurt feelings can be aired without blame and attacks. Be specific, keep your tone even, and do not let one incident contaminate the whole relationship. If you feel unable to keep a level tone, let your anger out first in another room by taking a bat, rubber hose, or pillow and beating on a convenient, unbreakable object.

5. Ask for your partner's help in dealing with your anger. No one likes being the sender or receiver of anger, but a coalition is unbeatable. You are enlisting a potential enemy as a friend.

To use this process, the Aries Woman must specifically renounce the idea that relationships are founded on competition and instead embrace the spirit of cooperation. She must learn to give up using anger to call the shots or punish a wrongdoer. Finally, she must recognize that inner harmony can be achieved and outer harmony maintained only when she has learned to respect another's rights as much as her own. When the Aries Woman learns to use anger constructively, as a prelude to change and a pragmatic way of keeping her relationship free of debris, she will be opting for free-flowing sexual energy and the potential to feel and share total pleasure.

Body Language Magic

Body Language Magic

Most people don't often mean what they say. How to Efficiently Decode People's Inner Feelings and Emotions Through Their Body Movements, and How You Can Use This Knowledge to Succeed in Your Career, Relationships, and Personal Life! What I am about to tell you might shock you. Many people think that the most popular way of communicating with other people is through the mouth. But what they didn't know is that actual verbal communication accounts to only around 10 or even less of the overall means to convey a message.

Get My Free Ebook


  • Janina Schuster
    What makes aries anger?
    8 years ago
  • matilda
    How is aries woman anger?
    8 years ago
  • arabella
    How aries expresses anger?
    7 years ago
  • settimo
    How to tame an angry aries?
    7 years ago
  • pertti lepp
    How to deal with an angry,stressed aries male partner?
    7 years ago
  • belinda brandybuck
    What makes an aries person angry?
    6 years ago
  • anette
    How to tests fear aries girl.?
    6 years ago
  • Sara
    Are aries angry people?
    6 years ago
  • heather
    Do aries have anger issues?
    5 years ago
  • louise
    When a aries woman is angry?
    5 years ago
  • murrin
    How to tame anger aries women?
    4 years ago
  • almaz haile
    What makes an aries woman angry?
    4 years ago
  • Ambretta
    What make a aries angry?
    4 years ago
  • johanna bader
    How can an aries woman change her ways?
    4 years ago
  • lavinia
    How tro control Aries anger?
    4 years ago
  • paul
    How to handle a aries man diplomatically?
    3 years ago
  • Joann Johnson
    How to handle aries anger?
    3 years ago
  • cotman brown
    How to understand an anger of aries man?
    3 years ago
    How an aries deals with anger?
    3 years ago
    Why does aries woman get angry easily?
    3 years ago
  • christian
    How to tame aries woman?
    3 years ago
  • helvi
    How to control anger of libra partner?
    3 years ago
  • hagos
    3 years ago
  • autumn
    How to handle a mad aries women?
    3 years ago
    What motivates an aries woman?
    3 years ago
    When aries woman is hurt?
    3 years ago
  • kalle
    What angers aries women?
    3 years ago
  • kaisa
    Why do aries sound defensive?
    3 years ago
  • aziz
    When an aries man is upset?
    3 years ago
  • Aman
    What angers aries woman in love?
    3 years ago
  • aleena
    How to psychology tame aries wife?
    3 years ago
  • helen
    How to manage angry of aries girls?
    2 years ago
  • gemma monaldo
    How to handle aries temper?
    2 years ago
  • Fiyori
    What to do when an aries woman is upset?
    2 years ago
  • maya
    What does an aries women do when angry or hurting?
    2 years ago
  • Oskari
    How to deal with aries anger?
    2 years ago
  • maddalena
    What makes the aries girl angry?
    2 years ago
  • Scudamor
    Why aries woman quick to be angry?
    2 years ago
  • mary
    How to make an arires no longer angry?
    2 years ago
  • Addolorata
    How to deal with aris angry women?
    2 years ago
  • Prospero
    Are aries sexually aggressive?
    2 years ago
  • virgilia
    How to control aries anger problems?
    2 years ago
  • demsas
    When aries female is hurt?
    2 years ago
    How aries manage their anger?
    2 years ago
  • torsten
    Can an aries woman control her feelings?
    2 years ago
  • aili
    How to apologize a very angry aries woman?
    2 years ago
  • gebre fesahaye
    How to make an aries woman angry?
    2 years ago
  • Leonie
    How to deal with an aries woman?
    2 years ago
  • adriana
    How to deal with an angry aries girl?
    2 years ago
  • madoc
    How to deal with an angry aries women?
    2 years ago
  • Belladonna
    How to deal an aries angry aries woman?
    2 years ago
  • nebyat
    How to handle an aries woman?
    2 years ago
  • rhianna
    How to deal with an aries temper?
    2 years ago
  • Vittore
    Do aries woman gets annoyed easily?
    2 years ago
  • mikki
    How to make an aries woman feel guilty?
    2 years ago
  • michael lutz
    How to control aries people their anger?
    2 years ago
  • nicol
    Do aries women get easily irritable?
    2 years ago
  • giordana schiavone
    How do aries handle issues?
    2 years ago
  • Haile Amanuel
    How to remove anger of aries girl?
    2 years ago
  • gildo
    How to make aris angry?
    2 years ago
  • Filibert
    What hurts an aries woman most?
    2 years ago
  • jarmo
    How aries women act when annoyed?
    2 years ago
  • aleisha
    How to handle aries man's anger in astrology?
    2 years ago
  • Girmay
    What happen when aries get mad?
    2 years ago
  • iona
    How to control Aries man's temper?
    2 years ago
  • Abbi
    When aries women hurt?
    2 years ago
  • marcho
    How to control my anger beibg an Aries?
    2 years ago
  • ruta yonatan
    How to control aries women?
    2 years ago
  • j kalb
    When aries woman is pissed?
    2 years ago
  • sian
    How to calm aries women when she is angry?
    2 years ago
  • ermias elias
    When Aries girl is upset?
    2 years ago
  • Anna
    How shud an Aries control anger?
    1 year ago
  • senja
    How can an aries girl control her anger?
    1 year ago
  • Omar
    What can an aries do if hurt or angry?
    1 year ago
  • nicole g
    What is happening in aries woman angry?
    1 year ago
  • Franziska
    How to calm down an angry aries woman?
    1 year ago
  • daniela
    How to apologize of an angry Aries women?
    1 year ago
  • Camelia
    How to calm ur aries girlfriend down?
    1 year ago
  • anna koivisto
    How does an aires woman treat you when she's angry at you?
    1 year ago
  • Dinodas
    What To do when aaries girl is mad at you?
    1 year ago
  • anne
    How to stop angry libra by aries?
    12 months ago
  • Jonne
    Why are aries so easily angered?
    11 months ago
  • danny
    How ti deel with angry aries?
    11 months ago
  • kauko
    How to convence aries female if angry?
    9 months ago
    Why aries gets mad so easy?
    8 months ago
  • tyler
    How to control aries anger psychologically?
    7 months ago
  • Lennie
    What is the anger level of an aries woman?
    7 months ago
  • Costante Panicucci
    How to control the anger of an aries woman?
    7 months ago
  • david
    How to ignore an aries man when angry?
    6 months ago
  • mac
    What to do when an aries lady is annoyed?
    6 months ago
    What makes an aeries mad?
    6 months ago
  • melba
    How to treat an aries woman when shes angry?
    6 months ago
  • John
    How to manage an angry aries male?
    5 months ago
  • lisa
    How to handle an angry aries man?
    4 months ago
  • Fethawit
    How long does it take an aries go sfop being mad?
    3 months ago
  • Aira
    How too handel an aries woman when shed mad or upset?
    2 months ago
  • Rose
    Can aries males get angry?
    1 month ago
  • mason
    How to get an angry aries male onside?
    1 month ago
  • Diana
    When an aries woman makes a libra man angry?
    19 days ago

Post a comment